HOW TO SING THE BLUES

[ds]

Nem manjo de blues mas achei algumas partes disso aqui engraçada

HOW TO SING THE BLUES

• Most blues begin "woke up this morning."
• "I got a good woman" is a bad way to begin the blues, unless you stick something nasty in the next line:
  • I got a good woman-- "with the meanest dog in town".
• Blues are simple. After you have the first line right, repeat it. Then find something that rhymes. Sort of:
  • Got a good woman with the meanest dog in town. He got teeth like Margaret Thatcher and he weighs about 500 pounds.
• The blues are not about limitless choice.
• Blues cars are Chevies and Cadillacs. Other acceptable blues transportation is Greyhound bus or a southbound train. Walkin' plays a major part in the blues lifestyle. So does fixin' to die.
• Teenagers can't sing the blues. Adults sing the blues. Blues adulthood means old enough to get the electric chair if you shoot a man in Memphis.
• You can have the blues in New York City, but not in Brooklyn or Queens. Hard times in Vermont or North Dakota are just a depression. Chicago, St. Louis and Kansas City are still the best places to have the blues.
• The following colors do not belong in the blues:
  • violet
  • beige
  • mauvre
• You can't have the blues in an office or a shopping mall, the lighting is wrong.
• Good places for the Blues:
  • the highway
  • the jailhouse
  • the empty bed
  Bad places:
  
  • Ashrams
  • Gallery openings
  • weekend in the Hamptons
• No one will believe it's the blues if you wear a suit, unless you happen to be an old black man.
• Do you have the right to sing the blues? Yes, if:
  
  • your first name is a southern state--like Georgia
  • you're blind
  • you shot a man in Memphis.
  • you can't be satisfied.
  No, if:
  
  • you were once blind but now can see.
  • you're deaf
  • you have a trust fund.
• Neither Julio Iglesias nor Barbra Streisand can sing the blues.
• If you ask for water and baby gives you gasoline, it's the blues. Other blues beverages are:
  
  • wine
  • Irish whiskey
  • muddy water
  Blues beverages are NOT:
  
  • Any mixed drink
  • Any wine kosher for Passover
  • Yoo Hoo (all flavors)
• If it occurs in a cheap motel or a shotgun shack, it's blues death. Stabbed in the back by a jealous lover is a blues way to die. So is the electric chair, substance abuse, or being denied treatment in an emergency room. It is not a blues death, if you die during a liposuction treatment.
• Some Blues names for Women
  • Sadie
  • Big Mama
  • Bessie
• Some Blues Names for Men
  • Joe
  • Willie
  • Little Willie
  • Lightning
• Persons with names like Sierra or Sequoia will not be permitted to sing the blues no matter how many men they shoot in Memphis.
  • Other Blues Names (Starter Kit)
    • Name of Physical infirmity (Blind, Cripple, Asthmatic)
    • First name (see above) or name of fruit (Lemon, Lime, Kiwi)
    • Last Name of President (Jefferson, Johnson, Fillmore, etc.)
    • Mix and Match

[Biel]

uasuhHUuhUUASHsuhSAHUSAHUASHUASAUSHashus, muito bom!


# Do you have the right to sing the blues? Yes, if:
* your first name is a southern state--like Georgia
* you're blind
* you shot a man in Memphis.
* you can't be satisfied.
No, if:
* you were once blind but now can see.
* you're deaf
* you have a trust fund.

uasuHuushaUHSshushusHUhusauhauhasuashsahusuASuAshaus!

[AcquiencE]

ehehhe
eh ateh legalzinho o texto
gostei

[Gerson]

legal msm

[Many Kalaveraa]

nem li

[esaporski]

UEHAUEHAUHEAUEhUAEhUAEH

Muito foda o texto... mas "Woke Up this Morning" que tem nas letras de Blues é tudo uma mentira, desde quando blueseiro acorda cedo?

[Roger Young]

Postado por Many Kalaveraa

nem li

nem lerei